“Color Our World With Pride,” the theme of this year’s Greater Palm Springs Pride Celebration, was selected to show support for all LGBTQ people in communities across the globe.

BY ORLY LYONNE

The 29th annual Pride celebration, held November 6-8, 2015 in downtown Palm Springs, will be the largest demonstration of equality and diversity ever seen in the Coachella Valley.  Considered to be one of the most scenic Pride celebrations in the world, the Greater Palm Springs Pride Celebration includes a free block party, two-day festival, parade, and twenty-five official events. The celebration follows Palm Springs Leather Pride weekend October 29-November 1, 2015 (see sidebar).

The global theme of this year’s Pride, “Color Our World With Pride” was selected to show support for all LGBTQ people in communities across the globe. The parade and festival provide a platform to reflect on the advances made in the equality movement and raise awareness and stand against discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expression.

The festival will feature full concert performances by 10,000 Maniacs, Frankmusik, the London based pop artist, American Idol Finalist & pop artist David Hernandez, Candis Cayne, Los Angeles based synth pop band DWNTWN, DJ Casey Alva, local pop artist Blake Lansing, Avant Americana genre-bending good time band the Evangenitals, big beat alternative rock band Lunden Reign, GayC/DC the world’s only all-gay tribute to AC/DC, and the rising LA-based pop singer/songwriter Wrabel.

OFFICIAL PALM SPRINGS PRIDE EVENTS INCLUDE:

Pride Honors Awards: Friday, October 9, 6pm-8pm.

Hyatt Palm Springs, 285 N. Palm Canyon Dr., Palm Springs.

The prestigious Palm Springs Pride Honors Awards are presented annually to individuals to honor the work they have put into furthering the causes of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender individuals and their allies.

For tickets visit: bit.ly/pshonors15.

Halloween Palm Springs: October 31, 6pm-10pm.

Join thousands of incredible and unique costumed revelers for Halloween on Arenas Rd. in Palm Springs. Bands, DJs and singers along with cash and prizes for the costume contest. Admission is FREE, but a suggested donation of $5 will benefit Desert AIDS Project, Palm Springs Gay Men’s Chorus, LGBT Community Center of the Desert and Greater Palm Springs Pride.

Rainbow Flag Raising: Friday, November 6, 10am.

Free community event.  Palm Springs Village Green.

Community leaders will be joined by civic officials at a flag raising ceremony for a rainbow flag which will fly above the streets in downtown Palm Springs for Pride weekend November 6-8. This event will commemorate the 36th Anniversary of the Rainbow flag and will be the official kickoff to a slate of Pride events and celebrations including the parade and festival.

OUT PSP: A Kick Off to Pride Weekend: Friday, November 6, 5pm-8pm.

El Mirador Plaza, 4th Floor Outdoor Patio.

Greater Palm Springs Pride and the Gay Desert Guide’s kick off to Pride weekend with tastings from Coachella Valley’s premier restaurants, bars and beverage purveyors. Drop in and sip on signature cocktails at our open bar while you and your friends watch the sun set behind the San Jacinto Mountains!

For more info visit pspride.org.

Hacienda Cantina and Beach Club Pool Parties: Official Pool Parties of Palm Springs Pride 2015—Friday, Saturday and Sunday, November 6-8.

Hacienda Cantina and Beach Club, 1555 S. Palm Canyon Dr., Palm Springs, CA.  No Cover all weekend, 21+.

For more info visit www.haciendacantina.com.

Pride Meet & Greet Party: Friday, November 6, 8pm to midnight.

CCBC Resort, 68300 Gay Resort Drive, Cathedral City. Tickets are $20 in advance online at pspride.org or $25 at the door. 21+.

Complimentary Margaritas, DJ Gruvbehr. CCBC Resort is the largest clothing optional gay men’s resort in the nation, featuring infamous pool parties with award-winning DJs.

Broadway in Drag Pageant: Friday, November 6, 8pm.

The Palm Canyon Theatre, 538 N. Palm Canyon Dr., Palm Springs.

A unique, one-of-a-kind Pride event. See a bevy of beautiful show queens vie for the crown in this lavish production around the glitz and glamour of Broadway.

For more info visit www.PalmCanyonTheatre.org.

Two-Day Pride Festival: Friday and Saturday, November 7 and 8.

The Festival is a free community event held on Palm Canyon Dr. between Amado and Baristo Rd. and on Arenas Rd. from S. Calle Encilia to Balardo.  Donations will be accepted at entry points to keep Pride free.

Palm Canyon Dr. will be closed to traffic and transformed into a vibrant, pedestrian friendly Pride Festival, unique to Southern California. Enjoy a diverse array of artists, entertainers, multiple beverage gardens and purveyors of all sorts including, jewelry, snacks and sweets.

For more info visit pspride.org.

DYKE MARCH & Rally: Saturday, November 7, 4pm-6pm.

Jackie Lee Houston Park directly in front of the Palm Springs Convention Center.

Women will be marching (purple attire requested) united and striving to bring awareness to all women’s issues.

For more information and details on the route please contact womenunitedps@gmail.com.

3rd Annual Official Ladies’ Party: November 7, 6pm-2am.

Alibi Azul, 369 N. Palm Canyon Dr., Palm Springs, $10 Cover.

All proceeds made at the door benefit Greater Palm Springs Pride to help keep Pride free for everyone to attend.

For more info visit www.alibiazul.com.

Women’s Pride Dance: Saturday, November 7, 7:30pm to midnight.

Hard Rock Hotel, 150 S. Indian Canyon Dr., Palm Springs.

A benefit for lesbians in crisis in the Coachella Valley.

For more info visit www.l-fund.org.

After Hours Dance Party: Saturday, November 8, 12am-4am.

CCBC Resort, 68300 Gay Resort Drive, Cathedral City.

Come frolic under the stars at the Official Pride after hours party for men at CCBC Resort, the largest clothing optional gay men’s resort in the nation.

For Weekend Pass visit bit.ly/ccbcparty.

Dish Creative Cuisine Official Event: November 8, 9:30am-1:30pm.

(Parade steps off at 10:00 a.m. from the front door of Dish Creative Cuisine at Tachevah Dr. and Palm Canyon Dr.)

Celebrate the 29th Annual Greater Palm Springs Pride Parade in typical Palm Springs style at the Official Parade Kick-Off point at dish Creative Cuisine. Experience all the action in a prime balcony location with VIP seating as the parade contingents pass right in front
of the party. dish Creative Cuisine is a proud Official Partner and will donate $10 of each ticket sold to Greater Palm Springs Pride.

Call now for reservations as this event always sells out 760-322-7171 or visit www.dishCreativeCuisine.com.

29th Anniversary Pride Parade: Sunday, November 8, 10am.

Steps off in the Uptown Design District at Tachevah and Palm Canyon Dr. and travels south through downtown ending at the entrance to the Pride Festival at Amado Rd. Free event.

For more info visit pspride.org.

PALM SPRINGS LEATHER PRIDE WEEKEND 

October 29-November 1, 2015

Palm Springs Leather Order of the Desert (PSLOD) invites Leatherfolk from around the world to gather in their desert oasis for a hot, sexy weekend to celebrate Leather Pride.

Official events begin at 9pm, October 29, 2015 and end at 8pm, November 1, 2015.

The organizing committee of PSLOD have gathered a stellar panel of judges, inluding (in alphabetical order) Esteban Bartholo—co-founder of Payaso LA, Randy Carmenaty—American Leatherman 2008, Randall “Bear Man” Klett owner of Stompers Boots and Leatherwerks, Sandy “Mama” Reinhardt—Mama’s Family, Patrick Smith—International Mr. Leather 2015, Clifton Tatum—Mr. Palm Springs Leather 2015 who has raised over $20,000 for his five youth charities in the past year, and Dan Woodward—writer for Leatherati.com.  And overseeing the weekend will be MC Lenny Broberg.

Over the past few months local bars, businesses and organizations have been hard at work hosting contests or choosing their representatives.  The cowhides have cooled momentarily  and the candidates for Mr. Palm Springs Leather 2016 are (in alphabetical order) Mr. Barracks Leather—Mark Austin, Mr. Chill Leather—James Bork, Mr. Hot Rodeo—Christopher Durbin, Mr. Copa Leather—Aaron Jones, Mr. Off Ramp Leathers—Steve Juneau and Mr. Tool Shed Leather—Jeff Maxwell.

And that’s just cornerstone event! The four-day long celebration of the Leather Lifestyle taking place from October 29th to November 1st is jam-packed with other hot events like the Meet and Greet, a Welcome Pool Party, the Formal Leather Dinner, a Cruise Party/Vendor Market, the Maze at InnExile, the ‘Gar ‘n Gear Party, the Silent Auction, the Leather/Fetish Victory Dance and Cruise Party,  another pool Party with  a BBQ and Wet T-shirt contest, a brunch hosted by the women of PSLOD and an official closing party.

And all of this takes place in one of the best vacation spots in the country, sunny and warm Palm Springs.

You can find out all of the details about the weekend and purchase your tickets at desertleatherpride.com.

Leatherman Steve Ganzell on your first leather purchase. The dos, the don’ts and finding what turns you on.

BY STEVE GANZELL

While there are probably a million reasons that fetishizing leather is kinda weird, there is usually one reason that is overwhelming for those of us in the leather community. It turns us on. We find it hot, sexy, and erotic. Not everybody shares that perspective, but if you do, there comes a moment when you decide that you are going to do something about it. You take that dramatic first step, you screw up your courage, you take a deep breath, you grab a credit card, and you go shopping.

I was asked what advice I would give somebody who was about to make some of those first purchases. I have seen some of the bad choices that folks have made and so here are a few thoughts.

NO CONSENSUS

Leather guys tend to be a rebellious lot. Trying to get them to agree is sometimes like trying to load jack-rabbits on a flat-bed truck. There are certain themes that can lead to groan inducing conversations that go on for hours. It is important to understand that no matter how long the conversation goes on, there will be no consensus. Some times we do things a certain way because of tradition. Tradition is not the same thing as rules. There is a difference between being creative and doing something differently and wearing white sox and brown shoes with your tuxedo because you don’t know any better.

You can usually fit in with the leather guys if you wear boots, 501s and a black t-shirt. You will start to notice certain traditions. Little by little you will notice things that turn you on. For example, you start to notice that there are guys wearing really  tight gloves. Not because their hands get cold but because they find them erotic and a fun addition to their sexual play. You will discover the things that you find hot and erotic.

CHEAP KNOCKOFFS

Most guys can’t afford to buy full custom made formal leathers (if you can, please contact me through this magazine) so start one piece as a time. Some things convey something to other folks in the community. For as many supposed rules there are just as many exceptions. You may want to ask if you are unsure.

It is very rare to find good cheap leather. The problem with cheap leather is that is usually looks cheap. There are folks out there who are willing to rip off designs and make them out of urine-cured-cat hide and with poor workmanship. Trust me…it shows. Well-made leather stands up to all kinds of abuse. The older it gets the better it looks. A little care and it will last for a long  me. When the cheap seams rip out or the leather tears, it makes the 6am walk of shame back to your hotel room at IML a lot more challenging.

You will wish you had waited to buy the good stuff rather than listening to the giggles of the hotel staff. So rather than be impatient and buy the cheap version, think about saving and getting the good stuff. BUT, at some point you will be tempted to either buy that vest or harness or chaps on Ebay, or from some vendor in a country you have never heard of before. When the stuff finally arrives you will notice it is a cheap knockoff of what you really wanted. The chaps will be all baggy and make you look like a shlub. The vest will be made out of pieces of leather joined together with stitches that look like it was made by Dr. Frankenstein. You will wish you had saved the money to get what you really wanted. It is worth the wait.

NATURE OF FETISH

There is a certain leather esthetic. If you are struggling to understand this I have a suggestion. A lot of our esthetic was documented in the erotic art of Tom of Finland. Take a look at Tom’s drawings and notice what and how things are exaggerated. The pants are not just  tight, they are impossibly  tight. The difference between that leather vest your dad wears to ride his motorcycle with the other accountants on the weekend and the vest you want to wear to a leather bar is that esthetic.

You may be really drawn to leather harness with studded epaulets. It may really turn you on. But after you have been 86d from every bar in town for causing injury to other patrons, you may wish you had come with something more traditional. There is a practical aspect to some of this. A Sam-Brown belt can not only make your Levis a little more “leather” it can keep your pants from hitting the floor if you unbutton them…you know like when you’re tucking your shirt in…yeah that’s why.

At some point along your leather journey, you will notice that you are about to pay more than you intended for something that is not all that practical. You are going to do it because that thing, whatever it is, turns you on. You know that wearing it will change how you walk, how you stand, and how you feel. At that moment, you will truly understand the nature of fetish and be well on your way to becoming one of the folks who feels exactly the way you do.

Each year on October 11, National Coming Out Day continues to promote a safe world for LGBT individuals to live truthfully and openly.

On Oct. 11, 1987, half a million people participated in the March on Washington for lesbian and gay rights. It was the second such demonstration in our nation’s capital and resulted in the founding of a number of LGBT organizations, including the National Latino/a Gay & Lesbian Organization (LLEGÓ) and AT&T’s LGBT employee group, LEAGUE.

The momentum continued four months after this extraordinary march as more than 100 lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender activists from around the country gathered in Manassas, Va., about 25 miles outside Washington, D.C.

Recognizing that the LGBT community often reacted defensively to anti-gay actions, they came up with the idea of a national day to celebrate coming out and chose the anniversary of that second march on Washington to mark it. The originators of the idea were Rob Eichberg, a founder of the personal growth workshop, The Experience, and Jean O’Leary, then head of National Gay Rights Advocates. From this idea the National Coming Out Day was born.

Each year on Oct. 11, National Coming Out Day continues to promote a safe world for LGBT individuals to live truthfully and openly.

For more info on National Coming Out Day visit www.hrc.org.

Joe Gregory, Mr. Sister Leather 2016, on “family” values, community outreach and true bonds.

BY MARK ARIEL   |   PHOTO BY ROBERT GREEN

Joe Gregory won the title of Mr. Sister Leather last month. Hosted by The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, Gregory is the group’s second title brother. He will compete in the Mr. LA Leather contest in March 2016.

Originally from a small town in rural Ohio named Champion, growing up gay was a challenge reveals Gregory in an interview with THE FIGHT.

“Everyone knew everyone else (and their business).  If you didn’t know what was going on in someone else’s life, it was generally because they were new to the area and hadn’t yet developed a reputation.  Being gay (or anything ‘different’ for that matter) made life a bit more difficult unless you were prepared to face the onslaught of hate from close-minded people who lived there.  Anything other than white, heterosexual, Christian, ‘family’ values was seen as a threat,” says Gregory.

“I attended Miami University in Oxford, Ohio, studying Spanish and Linguistics (I earned my Bachelor of Arts degree).  Miami University is a beautiful public college, however, Miami was even more conservative than life in Champion, Ohio, so I still struggled with dating and coming out while I was an undergraduate there.  It wasn’t until Miami offered a full tuition waiver to come back into its MBA program that I decided it was time to come out of the closet and accept (and be proud of) my sexuality.  No longer would I rely on chat rooms and ‘meet ups’ with guys that I hadn’t even seen in person, as I had done while in undergrad.  Now, I embraced who I was and would live my ‘true’ life.”

Gregory moved to LA in 2013, where he is currently a project manager for a large pharmaceutical company.

Regarding his involvement in the leather community Gregory says that he was “encouraged by my best friend, and fellow leather man, Xavier Espejo.  Ever since he and I started attending Folsom Street Fair together for the past few years, I knew I was a leather man at heart.  But, it wasn’t until I came to LA’s thriving leather scene that I truly felt I found my place… my adopted family… my home.”

“I had contemplated becoming a Sister (“pursuing the habit”) for several years,” reveals Gregory.  “When I arrived in LA and saw the community outreach the sisters do, I wanted to become involved with them… Throughout high school and college, I’ve been involved in community service organizations, and wanted to continue in that vein.  Helping others is at the core of my being.”

“After getting to know the leather community in Los Angeles, and the people in it, I decided that it was time to compete in a leather contest myself.  I had thought about competing within weeks of the Mr. LA Leather competition that ended in March 2015. I wanted to do so for the experience, and to bond closer to the people around me… not for the purpose of winning and to say that I have a title.”

“Ultimately,” states Gregory, “I decided that the Mr. Sister Leather most represented who I was as a person in this community.”

“The Mr. Sister Leather competition is unlike any of the other ones in LA,” states Gregory. “It allowed me to showcase some creativity, to be silly, and to connect with the audience without being too serious… which really is a reflection of how I am as a person.”

“As the new Mr. Sister Leather 2016, my platform is to bring more awareness to mental health/depression issues within the LGBT community, as well as to support suicide prevention,” says Gregory.  “I want people who feel ‘on the fringe’ of society to know that they have a place, are loved, and that we – as a community – look forward to welcoming them home.”

To learn more about The LA Sisters  visit: www.lasisters.org.

Face Off’s Gage Hubbard on working in the field he loves and the moment in his life when he realized that being “uncool” was cool.

BY MARCUS BARELA  |  PHOTO BY DUSTI CUNNINGHAM

Make-up artist, Gage (“Munster”) Hubbard knew early on that he wanted to make monsters. “I was 6 years old when I decided to focus on monsters and makeup. I always related to monsters in movies. I felt, and still feel, especially with the older universal films, mainly ‘Frankenstein,’ that monsters where only considered as such because of the fact that they were different and misunderstood.”

In an interview with THE FIGHT Hubbard talks about his appearance on the first season of “Face Off,” the moment in his life when he realized that being “uncool” was cool, and his one and only Hollywood crush.

Growing up—did your family support your artistic endeavors?

For the most part. I had a very difficult upbringing and come from a somewhat of a broken home. I don’t think my parents nor the people around me in terms of classmates knew what to make of me. I was made fun of almost every day growing up. But I was like the illegitimate love child of John Carpenter, Wes Craven, Edger Allan Poe and Walt Whitman… [laughs]. I didn’t have any friends until later in life when being “uncool” was cool. I always viewed the monsters in the films I watched as my friends.

How did your family react to you being gay?

They didn’t care, but I also didn’t ask for their permission. I’m very independent and moved out on my own when I was 16 due to a bad home life. So when I came out at the age of 23, I had zero fucks to give as to whether anyone accepted it or not. I had been on my own and asked my family for so little over the years that if they didn’t accept it—that would have fine by me.

Have you ever gotten to work on or with somebody you idolize?

You know it’s funny, I’ve gotten to meet and work with countless talented people over the years, from actors to other makeup artists, musicians to directors and cinematographers! I can’t say I really idolized anyone, however I do and did look up to many of them and their work. Makeup-wise I would say Ve Neill (Beetlejuice, Edward Scissorhands), Greg Cannom (Lost Boys, Vamp, Benjamin Button), and Steve Johnson (Species, Ghostbusters, Night of the Demons).

Do you have your own stories and characters that you’d like to bring to life?

Good question, and the answer is hell yes! I have a lot of different ideas all the time for cool and interesting characters. I’m working now as we speak on a coffee table style art book filled with many of them and I also have been writing my first screen play for rad horror film that I would love to see as a genre fan!

You were on the first season of Face Off, how did that experience change your life and your career?

It changed a lot in my life! I had been living in Los Angeles for 5 years at that point struggling in what was then a dying industry, still is very, very niche. I had been struggling to make a name for myself and had a part time job working for H&M and doing makeup gigs just to make my ends meet. The show helped me establish myself and put my art out there for the world to see. It helped people understand what exactly a “special effects makeup artist” is and does, which trust me—not many people knew prior to the show. I started working more steadily and was able to quit that part time job and just do effects makeup full time! I got to work with amazing artists on amazing things and do more then I ever thought I would! I owe the show a lot for that reason and I am very grateful and extremely humbled for the opportunities it’s provided me.

You have a lot of tattoos. What’s your next tattoo? How old were you when you got your first tatt? Do you have a favorite tattoo? Do you have a tattoo that you regret?

I was 21 when I got my first, Frankenstein, on the back of my left hand, then it slowly grew from there. Next will be Christina Ricci’s Wednesday Addams, followed by Michelle Pfeiffer’s cat woman. I have ZERO tattoos I regret as they are all characters from films that inspired and continue to inspire me.

You work with an FX shop. What is that like?

I work for a company called Immortal Masks. We specialize in state of the art silicone masks. I’ve been very good friends with the owners of the company for a very long time. It’s very much like a small tight little family there, I truly love it. I love the people I work with and am truly fortunate to be able to go to work with people I love every day—doing what I love, making monsters.

Do you prefer working on set more or working in the shop?

I love both for various reasons. Life on set can get extremely stressful, and you’re more often than not dealing with politics. However, that is where you get to bring characters to life. In the shop it’s more mandated and or routine, therefore more relaxed and enjoyable. So I would have to say I love both for those reasons.

Who have you not worked on that you’d kill to get into your chair?

Michelle Pfeiffer… Or Tom Hardy. He’s my one and only “Hollywood” crush.

It’s Halloween, is this your favorite time of year?

Yes OF COURSE!! My favorite time of year and my favorite holiday! It’s kinda Halloween all year round for me though.

Do you have a costume picked out?

I don’t yet, but usually I don’t until the day of. I always end up dressing up all month long as well as do other people’s makeup all month. We’ll see what this Halloween brings!

Report on intimate partner violence in LGBTQ and HIV-affected communities: transgender people face increased risk of violence.

BY VICTOR MELAMED

The National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs (NCAVP) has released its report “Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer and HIV-Affected Intimate Partner Violence in 2014.”

Key findings in the report include the following:

• For a fourth year in a row cisgender men killed by their male partners were most impacted by “intimate partner violence” (IVP) related homicide.

• LGBTQ and HIV-affected communities of color, bisexual survivors, transgender communities, and cisgender male survivors were uniquely and disproportionately impacted by IVP.

• A higher percentage of LGBTQ and HIV-affected survivors of intimate partner violence attempted to access the police, courts, and domestic violence shelters for support compared to previous years.

Additionally, the 2014 report found that transgender survivors were 1.98 times more likely to experience IPV in public areas, and 3.39 times more likely to experience discrimination than people who did not identify as transgender.

“Transgender people face increased risk of violence for many reasons, including transphobia and discrimination on the basis of gender identity,” said Mieko Failey, from the Los Angeles LGBT Center.

“It is critical that we address the barriers transgender survivors experience in accessing resources and provide supportive programs that explicitly include the transgender community,” added Susan Holt, also from the Los Angeles LGBT Center.

If your partner is abusive, or if you are abusive to your partner, the Los Angeles LGBT Center’s STOP Domestic Violence and/or Domestic Violence Legal Advocacy Project can help you. Call the STOP Domestic Violence Project at 323-860-5806. After regular business hours, you can also call the 24-hour national domestic violence hotline at 888-799-7233 (SAFE).

Los Angeles LGBT Center opens new West Hollywood facility to promote, protect sexual health. HIV/STD testing capacity triples; PrEP and PEP services expanded.

BY ORLY LYONNE  |  PHOTOS BY LISALISA PHOTOGRAPHY

Hundreds of people turned out last month to celebrate the opening of the new Los Angeles LGBT Center-WeHo. Located just above Gym Sportsbar and Coffee Bean at 8745 Santa Monica Blvd., the new Center-WeHo will offer free HIV testing, STD testing and treatment, HIV prevention medications: PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and PEP (post-exposure prohylaxis), vaccinations for hepatitis A/B and HPV, partner notification services, and condoms. Soon, Pap smears will also be available.

“At the new Los Angeles LGBT Center-WeHo, we’re offering the services and support that are essential to protecting the sexual health of our community,” said Center CEO Lorri L. Jean, “and we’re providing them in a welcoming, sex-positive environment where everyone will feel comfortable talking to our providers and counselors about their risk factors, their interest in going on PrEP, STD symptoms they may be experiencing, and more.”

The new 2,600-square-foot facility is considerably larger than the West Hollywood facility where the Center previously offered HIV/STD testing and STD treatment, enabling staff to provide up to 15,000 HIV/STD tests a year—that’s three times the capacity they could provide at The SPOT. Those who test positive for an STD can be treated onsite; those who test positive for HIV can receive immediate medical care and support services from the Center’s Jeffrey Goodman Special Care Clinic in Hollywood, which offers the same sexual health services as the Center-WeHo.

“If everyone who is HIV-positive could get treatment and reduce their viral load to an undetectable level, HIV could be stopped,” said the Center’s Director of Sexual Health Services, Dustin Kerrone, “but first they have to know they’re positive. Today, one out of seven people who are HIV-positive don’t know it. By increasing our testing capacity, by offering fast and convenient testing in a sex-positive environment, and by making it easy to obtain PrEP and PEP, we hope to help slow the spread of HIV in L.A. where 83% of those living with HIV are gay or bisexual men.”

In addition to offering PrEP and PEP, the Center-WeHo will help those who are uninsured, or whose insurance plans don’t cover it, qualify for financial assistance programs to help cover the costs.

To promote the new facility, the Center has launched a marketing campaign dubbed “What R U Into?” that features a diverse range of men in various West Hollywood locations, pictured with the wide-range of emojis they use on smart phone apps to convey what they’re “into.” The campaign’s simple message reads: “Whatever you’re into, caring for your sexual health is our priority at the new Los Angeles LGBT Center-WeHo.” The campaign will run in print, online, mobile and outdoor media supported by the website whatRUinto.org.

The Los Angeles LGBT Center-WeHo’s hours of operation are Monday—Friday, 11 a.m.—2:30 p.m. and 4—7 p.m. Testing services are available on a walk-in basis or appointments can be made by calling 323-860-5855. Center-WeHo is located above Gym Sportsbar and Coffee Bean at 8745 Santa Monica Blvd. Additional information is available at lalgbtcenter.org/WeHo.

“The National Coalition of Rent Boys & Allies” advocates for the legal rights of male escort workers.

BY VICTOR MELAMED

An association of rent boys and their supporters has organized a national advocacy group in response to the Homeland Security and NYPD raid on Rentboy.com in New York city, August 25, 2015.

The National Coalition of Rent Boys & Allies (www.ncorb.com) was created as a not for profit corporation in Florida by Fort Lauderdale attorney Norm Kent, a well known First Amendment advocate.

Along with Kent, the initial incorporators include an internationally known rent boy, who is now a law student at Hastings School of Law in San Francisco, and Pamela Dore (mr. Pam) a California based activist and ally who has spoken out frequently on behalf of sex workers.

ENTERING THE BEDROOMS

Jonathan Crutchley, founding partner and owner of the world’s largest gay brands that includes Manhunt and Jack’d, joined the advisory board of The National Coalition of Rent Boys & Allies (NCORB) last month.

“It is no business of the government at any level—be it federal, state, or local—to enter the bedrooms of consenting adults and tell them what they may or may not do within that private setting,” said Crutchley on his decision to join NCORB.

“Such matters are certainly not the business of the Department of Homeland Security, which was created after September 11, 2001 to protect citizens from foreign terrorists.”

Federal agents joined the NYPD in shutting down Rentboy on the assertion that Rentboy was using interstate commerce to violate local New York laws.

Last month Crutchley made a financial contribution to the legal defense team representing Jeffrey Hurant, founder of Rentboy.com.

Crutchley is not alone in believing that federal agents violated the constitutional rights of U. S. citizens. The editorial board of The New York Times called the raid “peculiar.”

“I founded my company in the name of individual privacy and sexual freedom,” Crutchley said. “In the name of individual liberty, the Federal government needs to do the job it was given to do by the Constitution.”

A COLLECTIVE VOICE

“The Department of Homeland Security has initiated a questionable legal action which has terrorized thousands of men who were lawfully trading their time and companionship for legitimate compensation,” said NCORB founder attorney Norm Kent last month.

“There is a need for these men to have a collective voice and open forum to speak out against the raid and for their rights.”

NCORB aims to fill the need. Its website contains a media outpost of news articles, columns, reactions and information about the Rentboy raid.

The site will also soon provide unfettered access to legal advisories and ‘know your rights’ forums for rent boys remaining in the industry, as well as regular updates on the status of the federal case against the principals of the Rent boy prosecution.

“Public pressure may not stop the prosecution, but it will certainly let the US attorney know where the LGBT community stands on targeting our population and our partners,” says Kent.

Is the queer community on the edge of assimilation, or a sexual revolution?

BY BRENDEN SHUCART

2015 has been a monumental year for the queer communities. The admittance of gays into the military and the Supreme Court’s ruling on same-sex marriage represent the culmination of the long fought equality agenda that has dominated the LGBTQ political landscape for more than a decade.

Admittedly, there’s still lots of work to be done; many states still lack employment nondiscrimination, and a Republican in the White House could undo much of our recent success. But as, so many minority groups before us, the queer communities stand poised to become a part of mainstream middle-class America. (Yay?)

Yet even as same-gender couples across the county face the newfound opportunity and mounting pressure to assimilate, another sexual revolution is quietly building momentum—no, not PrEP (at least, not yet).

I’m talking about polyamory.

POLY COMMUNITIES

Not to be confused with polygamy, an often very repressive system where one dude is entitled to multiple wives, polyamory can be described as the practice of accepting non-exclusive romantic and/or sexual relationships-basically ethical and honest non-monogamy.

There are growing poly communities popping up in out of the way places like Louisville KY and Lebanon OH. Practitioners are taking over apartment complexes in Brooklyn. It’s even seriously being discussed by Chinese economists as a solution to their country’s cavernous gender gap.

Polyamory is clearly experiencing something of a “moment,” and the fact that it doesn’t occupy a radically more prominent position within public discourse seems like it can only be attributed to its being overshadowed by the bombardment of news about PrEP and marriage equality.

FACING STIGMA

Trying to get solid statistics on practitioners of polyamory is basically impossible. There is no “poly” box on the census and even if there were many would be likely not to check it. Like many other groups engaged in sexual and relationship practices alternate to the mainstream, poly folk often face stigma and discrimination. But the best estimates of organizations like “Loving More,” a polyamory advocacy group, there are anywhere between 1 million and 1.5 million people living in the United States who poly-identify, and I am one of them.

My first real relationship was with two men I met in San Francisco—and quickly fell in love with. There were men before them of course—men I fucked, men I lived with, even men I loved—but if I’m being honest, the three years that I spent in the home that we shared just off 18th, where the mission meets the Castro, was the first one, I think, that I regarded with complete and total seriousness.

The boys (let’s call them Elijah and Enoch, after my two favorite characters from Hebrew mythology) had been together for two years, and moved to the city together not long before I had met them. Elijah loved to cook and work in the garden. He was both a lover and a fighter, who radiated a smoldering sexuality that captivated even straight boys and possessed a scathing temper it was best not get to close to. Enoch and I worked together at gay bookstore which was once beacon of queer culture and history in San Francisco’s Castro district, and which now, sadly, no longer exists. He had a beautiful angelic face beneath a tangle of dark silky curls, and eyes so achingly sad they inspired in me a desperate need to put my arm around him and keep him safe. We shared a love of books and old movies and drinking far too much when we felt uncomfortable.

There is a lot of responsibility that goes along with being invited into the relationship and home of a pre-existing couple. There’s a sense of obligation to do right by them, to tread carefully and not somehow weaken their bond, matured long before my arrival. Also outwardly, I felt responsible to represent us as a valid and fulfilling unit, every time I pointed across a bar, or a pool table, or Dolores Park and told some incredulous queen, “I’m here with them, and I’m going home with them.”

In fact, I held our relationship with something approaching reverence, at least in the beginning.

WORSHIPFUL SERIOUSNESS

Looking back, I think that was the only way it could be. The notion of the three of us, fierce young wild faggots such as ourselves, with our often hungry eyes and prevalent impulse control problems, could form a serious partnership seemed so laughable on its face, so far outside even the relatively lax societal norms of our California upbringings, that the only way to make it real (for myself and everybody else) was to treat it with an almost worshipful seriousness.

Not that translated into me being an awesome boyfriend necessarily, or even a consistent one. I was young, and oftentimes selfish and cruel in the way young men can be, but I was devoted to them, in my way, and I loved them more than I ever thought possible.

In a real sense they taught me how to love, how to communicate. Any poly practitioner you talk to will tell you that the essence of any successful poly relationship is communication, but they don’t explain to you what communication is—it’s listening with an open heart even when you don’t like what you’re hearing, and doing your utmost to speak your truth clearly, even when you’re afraid it’ll hurt.

HUNGER FOR NOVELTY

Of the interpersonal quirks I had inherited from my parents, a penchant for serial monogamy is probably the most boring. I had a pattern: I would meet someone awesome and fascinating, spend three passionate months with them, and then I would begin to wonder “can I really spend the rest of my life with this person?” and bolt; either into the arms of one of the two guys I dated in high school (because I also got my dad’s painfully romantic love of lost causes and inability to admit defeat) or into a shiny new three-month tryst.

I could never articulate to any of these guys that my feelings for them hadn’t diminished in any way, I was just horny, and worse, I was curious. I wanted to try everything. Initially I think some part of me thought that hunger for novelty—which always seemed to be getting me in trouble—would be satiated by two men. In retrospect it fed it.

ABUNDANCE OF LOVE

My SoCal friends would tease me and say I had developed “San Francisco Values,” one even told me (with deadly seriousness) that I was being selfish and should just be satisfied with one guy. When I laughed he threw his hands up in the air and called me a “slut,” and I only laughed harder, because I totally was. The three of us fucked constantly.

It was both amazing and exhausting. But on those rare occasions I didn’t have it in me, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself excited for their good time and pleased by the pleasure. Most poly practitioners refer to as ‘compersion’, the feeling of happiness at other people’s happiness or success. I came to believe in principle what I had always felt in my heart, love and sex are not scarcities to be jealously guarded but are instead abundances to be shared.

That abundance of love, which suffused our relationship is the real heart of the polyamory revolution. When things eventually broke down, it certainly wasn’t due to a lack of love.

NEXT IN LINE

I never expected to get married, not really; more importantly, I didn’t grow up with the expectation that I’d get married-and mine will probably be the last generation of gay men for whom that’s true.

Growing up I was conscious of the pressure on my brothers to “meet a nice girl and settle down” that seemed to emanate from our parents and the very fabric of society itself that seemed to bypass me altogether. The notion of two men getting “gay married” seemed to me to be fantastically far-fetched, a practical impossibility. And that societally imposed gulf between me and holy matrimony in some ways made polyamory both more appealing and more possible.

Part of me thrilled at the inherent queerness of three men together.

But I think much of one’s perspective in these matters can be attributed to the generation into which we are born.

You see, I came out in 1996, the same year Ellen went on “Oprah” and got denounced by a bunch of nice-looking mid-western mom types, with their overabundance of denim and vaguely moist-
looking perms.

I remember thinking “If they don’t like Ellen, they’ll never like me.” And if had ever secretly held hopes of a big gay wedding, I quickly abandoned any notion that I’d land the staring role in any ceremony that didn’t involve keeping a good friend in the country.

I suspect that that my fiancé had a somewhat different experience growing up queer.

Whereas my only gay role model options growing up were basically limited to be “Xena, Warrior Princess” and Ricky Vasquez from “My So Called Life”—both of whom are fucking awesome, let it be known—my fiancé, just four years behind me, had a much richer, more varied, and (frankly) more empowered cast of queers to choose from.

I’m pretty sure he was always confident that there would be a wedding in his program. If he felt excluded from the straight world, it was with the expectation of someone next in line to get in. For me the line was too long to think about the party inside. I made my own fun.

SENSE OF EXCLUSION

It made me melancholy at first, the sense of exclusion. I used to consider my brothers over the protective wall provided by whichever sci-fi paperback had my attention for the moment and try to take stock of the gulf that seemed to languish between us. As I gradually came into my own as a gay man, melancholy receded to make way for that certain wistfulness one reserves for countries they’ll probably never visit, until gradually, by the time I found myself living in San Francisco I had come to regard my queerness as a gift. The sense of otherness that separated me as a teenager began to seem like a blessing as an adult.

The proverbial world of normal boys seems enticing to those of us who are, for whatever reason, denied entry. But I realized long ago that what looks like a carnival from the outside can also feel like a prison for those unhappily trapped inside its metaphorical walls. As a gay man, I knew I would have had to fight if I wanted to get married, or have a kid, or serve in the military, I knew that I’d have to struggle too if I wanted a life that resembled those of my friends from high school, but I knew that I would have chosen it, because I wanted it.

That’s the gift of being queer, I think. The freedom of choice being different forces us to reckon with.

OUTSIDE THE CARNIVAL

I have a sneaking suspicion that my fiancé (who grew up in the Midwest, in a very nice, upper middle class family of doctors and lawyers) regards my time with Enoch and Elijah with the same bemused affection one might have for a partner’s time in college spent chained to a tree of following The Dead around the Pacific Northwest.

He’s spent practically his whole life waiting just outside that carnival, and now that he can go inside, he can’t imagine why anyone would want anything else.

And I’ll be honest, now that I have this ring on my finger, I feel the allure of state-sanctioned matrimony. I appreciate the idea of standing before my friends, family, and community with my man and saying “We are a family. We are in this together.” I find myself using the word “fiancé” in conversation to lend my relationship extra weight. However—it’s worth noting that all across the western world marriage, that institution which conservative heterosexuals fought for more than a decade to exclude us from, is dying. Fewer and fewer heterosexual couples get married each year, and those that do end in divorce about half the time.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. “Marriage” can be redefined. If it can include two people of the same sex? Why not three?

Assimilation works in both directions, as we are changed by acceptance into the mainstream, the mainstream itself is changed. And perhaps, now, those lessons, hard learned, can be our gift to the broader culture.

Los Angeles LGBT Center’s student safety program goes nationwide.

BY VICTOR MELAMED

A pilot program developed and launched two years ago by the Los Angeles LGBT Center and the Los Angeles Unified School District (LAUSD) with community partners to help make schools safer for LGBTQ students, has proven so successful—with students, teachers and administrators—that it’s being adopted by school districts throughout the country with the support of the Center and the Gay-Straight Alliance Network (GSA Network), reaching millions of students.

Since the “OUT for Safe Schools” initiative was launched in the nation’s second largest school district in October 2013, more than 30,000 LAUSD teachers and other staffers have been wearing rainbow badges that proudly identify themselves as LGBTQ allies and protectors of students who are LGBTQ.  Now, nine other school districts throughout the country—in New York, Chicago, Boston, San Francisco, Oakland, San Diego, Duval County (Florida), and Washington, D.C.—are adopting the program, reaching more than 2.5 million students (grades K-12).

“Despite increased public acceptance of LGBT people in general, many school campuses remain toxic environments for LGBTQ students, contributing to higher rates of suicide, depression, homelessness and HIV infection,” said Los Angeles LGBT Center CEO Lorri L. Jean. “We approached the LAUSD about developing this program to create visible adult allies throughout the entire school system, helping LGBTQ youth feel safe and supported while helping to deter would-be bullies. Now, wherever students look, they’re sure to see adults who proudly identify themselves as LGBTQ allies for students.”

Staff in all participating districts will be trained by GSA Network staff, with funding from a grant, to improve the campus climate for LGBT students.

An interview with Dr. Sam Najmabadi, the medical director of the Center for Reproductive Health & Gynecology, on LGBT family building.

Dr. Najmabadi, what options are currently available for a gay couple interested in having their own children?

Same sex male couples have to use an egg donor and a surrogate. The egg donor and the surrogate can be one in the same or it can be an egg donor giving eggs and we would do in-vitro to get the eggs out and then transfer into a surrogate. With all couples in advance to the process we do an STD test and a semen analysis for men. (Women also do a hormone test). All patients contributing to the egg or sperm are tested genetically.

Females can purchase sperm for in home insemination or insemination by a doctor into the uterus with or without medication. If intrauterine insemination does not work then further testing is needed and then the next step would be IVF. We can also remove the egg from one partner inseminating with semen from donor and then putting the egg into the other partner so that each person can be a part of the process.

Can you explain the process of finding an egg donor and gestational carrier?

A gestational carrier carries eggs from a donor. The process of finding an egg donor and gestational carrier starts with a consultation with your endocrinologist. You will then select an agency to work with. The agency will help you find an appropriate donor and surrogate.

Once the donor or surrogate is chosen they have to be medically cleared for the process. Then they have to go through legal clearance, with all the appropriate contracts. This process may take a few weeks to a few months.

After finding a donor and carrier—what needs to be done from a medical point of view?

This varies by needs of the patient. For egg donation—the donor is screened then stimulated for retrieval of eggs. For surrogates—after being screened—we prepare the uterus with hormones for transfer of embryos. For sperm donors—after being screened—we will need it either fresh or frozen for the treatment.

What effect—if any—does the gestational carrier have on the genetic composition of a baby?

Zero. The gestational carrier does not contribute to the genes of the baby. Only the sperm and egg donor. That is where the DNA comes from.

What are some obstacles we need to be prepared for during this process?

If at any point if someone has a positive STD panel this can derail the process. If anyone contributing to the creation of the baby has abnormalities—that will decrease the odds or make the process not possible. We may have to look at alternative ways of getting pregnant.

Is it possible to have a healthy baby if my partner is HIV positive? How safe is sperm washing?

Yes—it is possible as long as their viral count is negative. Sperm washing—depending on the type of washing done coupled with viral testing—can be safe and reduce transmission at very low levels.

Is there anything we haven’t asked you that you would like to share with our readers?

There are many ways for gay couples to plan for a family! We encourage people to come and have a consultation to discuss ways to preserve their fertility by freezing their sperm for a future date or help them with any other process to create a family.

For more info, or to schedule a consultation call 310-360-7584
or visit reproductive.org.

Drag correspondent Pickle on “Le Bal” at Ace Hotel DTLA last month: “The whole evening could be described as relentless orgasmaticness.”

BY PICKLE  |  PHOTOS BY SARA TOLLEFSON

It almost looks like there should be mummies hanging from the ceiling,” remarked the gorgeous Candis Cayne, appropriately calling attention to the fact that a drag extravaganza was being held in a space that looked a little more suited for Dracula’s piano recital. The beautiful Theatre at the Ace Hotel with its Spanish Gothic architecture has the remarkable quality of being both incredibly ornate and austere all at once. Don’t get me wrong, the dark grey backdrop and industrial DJ booth featuring the charismatic Kim Anh, was the perfect aesthetic choice for housing the evening’s glitzy divas. These are champions of glamour who have no need for backdrops or moving sets.

Take-away? Le Bal was the shit.

The whole evening could be described as relentless orgasmaticness. Ms. Cayne was, obviously, a fab host. She has a melodious voice and a  nudge-nudge show-bizzy tone that is still earnest and warm, somehow. “I’m not having a nip slip, so that’s good,” she noted, splaying herself on the lip of the stage, “My parents are here.” Side-note: her hair looked as if it had been spun from gold and gently passed through the water that trickled from Venus’ shell as she emerged from the sea.

The acts were stellar. Willam’s Spanish version of the iconic “Boy is a Bottom” was yet another testament to her literally infallible comedy and showmanship. Mid-song she charged through the aisle wildly shaking a tiny blue maraca, her Louboutins tearing up the carpet and I couldn’t help but think, “If you don’t like Willam, you’re literally a moron.” Same with Courtney Act. Her hypnotic accent and unspeakable beauty is divine to experience.

The lights in Ricky Rebel’s act almost gave me a seizure (he looked like an extra from “Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century”) but I still lived for it. And I guess he likes girls, too. Or rather, “boys boys boys boys and sometimes girls.” Ladies?

Delta Work’s numbers are always untouchable. Her sharp, full-bodied lip-synch always gives me goosebumps (plus her hair was so high it caught three separate spotlights).

Mariah Balenciaga brought old-school, stage stomping Paris isn’t just burning it’s literally a mushroom cloud of FIERCENESS, tearing off her huge, what I’ll call “preliminary wig” and gold coat in a reveal that gave me a heart attack. And that was before she cartwheeled into the splits 5,045 times.

Of course the crowned headliner herself, Raja, who is so creative it makes me want to kill myself, appeared at the end in a glow-in-the-dark Venus fly trap. I thought for a wild moment that someone had (finally) roofied me but then remembered where I was and that I should have expected no less from the queen of fashion herself. A VENUS FLYTRAP. Like, as in, its GLOWING mouth opened and she was there, wriggling her long, tentacle fingers and looking like deities WISH they did.

The incredible performances aside, perhaps my favorite part of Le Bal was the event itself. Tasteful, elegant, fabulous. A crowd of screaming queers and supporters, grinning and having to be pried away from the lobby bar by some very diligent ushers. There’s no doubt that the night did take Drag and elevate it to a proper stage, but it also didn’t take the chaotic fun and life we love about Drag in its usual context. I mean, the show started an hour and a half late! Thank god. Very few good things in life are punctual. Pickle out.

How one gay man’s guardian angels saved the day. 

BY ERIC SLAYTON

I was a six-year-old child raising my two-year-old and infant brothers. My mother was a drug addict and my father was no where to be seen.

I remember my childhood being a merry go-round of insecurity and change, not understanding what I was witnessing. A mother who slurred her words, a father who walked out on us, and an internal feeling that I was different, were the feelings I harbored and held inside.

Luckily, I had a guardian angel, two to be exact.

One day we were whisked away by Social Services and taken to the local police department. We were kept there until our grandparents arrived.

I do not remember the major details, yet my mother [grandmother] tells me about the phone call she received: “Ma’am if you ever want to see your grandchildren again, you need to get down here asap!”

After having raised a family of three my grandparents answered the call and decided to adopt myself and two younger brothers. This process is considered a “Closed Adoption,” when the biological parents have no contact with the adoptive parents or the child, and all records are sealed.

Through out the two-and-a-half years of my adoption process I was involved in decisions that would affect me—would I want to see my father when I came to court, did I want to live with my grandparents, were they taking proper care of me, was this a process I was okay with, and how am I doing.

I chose to never see my father nor my mother as my grandparents had primarily raised me since infancy. My mother only wanted me when she saw fit and father couldn’t care less.

These conditions caused me to have problems at school, bully kids, not listen to teachers, and get suspended. I had anger problems—I needed a coping mechanism to help me deal with my frustrations and feelings, without lashing out at people.

I found that music was my cure—it allowed self-expression without judgment, I wasn’t expected to look or act a certain way, just be willing to learn how to read, write, and play the music in front of me. It was love in a pure form.

My last few months of the adoption process were a little less rough, as my grandparents had been awarded custodial rights, and the process of severing parental right from my mother and father had begun. It was finally becoming a reality. Music has helped establish a means to cope and further help me grow. My caseworker and judge were delighted to see my sing and show my smiling face when I appeared, and my level of comprehension had grown.

Teachers no longer feared having me as a student, I mellowed out in my interactions with other kids, and could play on the playground without throwing the tetherball into someone’s face!

I remember the finalization; the day the adoption was complete and approved. I sat in the courtroom, staring at the judge, and nodding my head to everything he asked. He was actually speaking to my new “parents”, yet I was answering every question asked. He finally asked me, “Eric, are you ready to go home with your parents”, I yelled “YES” at the top of my little lungs! It was over: a two-and-a-half year journey had finally ended, at least the legal portion of it.

In my new home I had everything a child could want—every Nintendo system, roller blades, Game Boy, skateboards, and so much more. Yet the feeling of discomfort I once had as a little kid was still there. What was it? I was GAY! BOOM the world turned upside down!

It wasn’t until I came to terms with that one feeling of angst and discomfort, did I truly become at peace with myself and understand a lot more of the struggle through this adoption. Not only was I harboring the feelings I had about the situation, I was dealing with this feeling of “why do I not like girls” and “I love to vacuum and shop!”

Understanding that vital piece of information allowed me to grow even more, understanding myself, my desires, inspirations, and channel that into who I want to become.

The support received from friends and family helped me know I was loved, regardless of the situation I felt I was in.

Adoption affects the life of the adoptee and the adopter. Giving faith and hope to someone who felt they have nowhere to go and no one to love them is truly life changing.

Embracing that individual and opening your heart to them is a gratitude that cannot be measured in success or money.

There are not enough parents to care for all of the children in the foster care system. You can make a difference.

BY ORLY LYONNE

RaiseAChild.US is a national nonprofit that promotes family building to a broad spectrum of prospective parents to solve the U.S. foster care crisis. They do not discriminate based on sexual orientation, marital status, gender, age, or income.

There are not enough parents to care for all of the children in the foster care system. Every leading child welfare organization concludes that successful families come in a variety of configurations. Research supports equality. Together, we can decrease the number of children in the system, by increasing the number of qualified prospective parents. You can make a difference.

RaiseAChild.US recruits, educates, and nurtures supportive relationships equally with all prospective foster and adoptive parents while partnering with agencies to improve the process of advancing foster children to safe, loving, and permanent homes.

Their vision is to be the nationwide leader in the recruitment and support of LGBT and all prospective parents interested in building families through fostering and adopting to meet the needs of the 415,000 children in the foster care system.

They promote family building by fostering and adoption to a broad spectrum of prospective parents through social media, radio, television, and outdoor advertising campaigns.

As foster/adoptive parents themselves, RaiseAChild.US Parent Advocates provide personalized support to help prospective parents navigate the foster/adoption process with their partner agencies. From orientation to training and throughout the child matching process, their Parent Advocates are available to assist with your concerns and questions.

For more info visit: RaiseAChild.US.

Palm Springs Pride headliner Wrabel on finding your own voice, a painful breakup and the “bully in his head.”

BY MARK ARIEL  |  PHOTO BY MATHEW TUCCIARONE

With his first single “Sideways” featured on iTunes and downloaded nearly half a million times—and his song “Ten Feet Tall,” featured in a Bud Light commercial during the 2014 Super Bowl—it’s safe to say that singer and songwriter Stephen Wrabel (better known as simply “Wrabel”) is on his way to becoming a household name.

Wrabel, headlining at Palm Springs Pride this month, has written songs for Phillip Phillips, Adam Lambert, Katharine McPhee, Pentatonix, Will Young, and Ellie Goulding and is consistently called upon by top producers in the music industry while continuing to write for his next record.

In an interview with THE FIGHT Wrabel, a gay man, talks about a painful breakup, his creative process and the “bully in his head.”

Where did you grow up?

I was born in Long Island, but we moved quite a bit… I spent time in Virginia, northern and southern California, Massachusetts, Texas, even Australia. Bouncing around was fun for the most part… challenging at times, but I really got used to being the “new kid,” which had its pros and cons.

Were you ever bullied as a kid?

I was only bullied directly a few times that I can remember. The meanest bully growing up, and still now at times, is myself. I can really do a number on myself in my head. I’ve been working through that as I grow up (whatever “growing up” really means… still trying  to work that one out).

I find being honest and open with myself—and those close to me—brings about so much healing. Sharing my story with people and sitting and listening to the stories of others is so eye and heart and mind opening. We’re all given a gift in our story, and it really is so important to share that gift with others.

It’s easy for me to exist completely in my own little world, but that’s when the big bully in my head really starts to work. I can bring myself to tears, keep myself in bed, lock myself inside… it’s so hard sometimes, but  something as simple as talking about that begins to take away its power and can start to quiet its very, very loud voice.

When did you know you wanted to be a singer/songwriter/musician?

I remember writing my first song around 3rd or 4th grade. My parents bought me a little janky keyboard, and I wrote a song about climbing up a mountain to one of the preset demo songs on it. Oh what I would give to hear it now…

Through middle school and high school I was in choir and show choir and school musicals and all that. I started playing the piano when I was about 16 and really started writing then, too.

After high school I went to Berklee College of Music in Boston for a semester, before moving out to LA.

How did you start writing for other artists? And when did you decide to perform your own material?

Writing for others was kind of an accident? Well, not completely… I was writing songs with whomever I could write with and playing shows wherever I could. My first placement was with Blake Lewis on his sophomore album. He’s a very sweet guy! So talented, too. Since then,

I’ve written songs with/for Phillip Phillips, Adam Lambert, Katharine Mcphee, Pentatonix, Will Young, and Ellie Goulding… Wow. I just got goose bumps saying that out loud…

It’s so bizarre to me looking back and realizing how many songs I’ve been a part of. I don’t mean that in a “well LOOK at ME!” kinda way… it’s actually quite the opposite! (Back to the bully in my head… ha).

I feel so humbled and honored to have worked with such wonderful and brilliantly talented artists.

Many of the songs that ended up with other artists started as songs for me—and through some weird, unexpected series of events, ended up with somebody else.

Through it all, I’ve been performing my own material. I sometimes feel like I ‘m leading a double life in that regard, but I wouldn’t change it!

Ten Feet Tall,” was featured in the Bud Light commercial during the 2014 Super Bowl. How did that change your life?

Oh, in so many ways… it was the first time I heard myself on TV like that. It was just such a bizarre feeling. I spent the day surrounded by friends watching and reeling and crying and laughing (and tweeting). So much exposure… I was (and am) so proud of the song, and so in love with what Afrojack did to it—a true moment to remember.

Can you tell us about the process of working on Sideways? What frame of mind were you in at the time?

Almost all of it was written in London. One song in Paris, and one in LA. I was going through a breakup at the time. A two-year relationship seemingly falling apart at the seams. It was a very painful time for me, but also a very eye-opening experience. The EP really arcs over the whole thing. From the week it started, with “Ten Feet Tall”, to trying to find the spark again in “Into The Wild”, to the summer I flew out to Ohio as a complete surprise (whilst broken up…) in “Give It Time.”

I typically start with chords and then will get on the mic and just sing some melodies and any words that happen to come out. Then it’s about piecing it together and looking at what it is and where it’s going and shaping it as it comes.

What projects are you currently working on?

I just woke up this morning to see that the Pentatonix record I worked on debuted at number 1 this week on Billboard! Such an amazing feeling! Unbelievable, really… So proud of the song and even more proud of the group. An acapella record at number 1?! Freakin. Yes!

I’m anxiously awaiting November 6 which is when Ellie Goulding’s new record “Delirium” comes out. I co-wrote a song on there called “Devotion,” which is very special to me.

Other than that, I’m back in working on my next body of work which I am beyond thrilled to say is now taking form and turning into something I ‘m very inspired by.

I’m independent now, and at first that was very scary. It’s so easy to just wake up and go where somebody tells you to go, write with who somebody tells you to write with, sound like what somebody tells you to sound like. It’s much harder, I’m finding, to just sit with yourself and express yourself…

I’m pushing myself by working with new collaborators, while also learning to trust myself all over again in the studio. Fighting the bully in my head, and really re-learning to allow myself to just be, personally and professionally and creatively.

For more on Wrabel visit wrabelmusic.com.

Salah Abdeslam, who is now believed to be in disguise (right) and going by a new name.

Paris terror fugitive Salah Abdeslam was seen visiting gay bars in Brussels before the attacks.

BY VICTOR MELAMED

One of the terrorists involved in the deadly Paris shootings last month was thought to be a rent boy, after he was regularly seen flirting with other men in Brussels’ gay bars, according to various media reports.

Salah Abdeslam, 26, has been on the run after gunning down crowds of Friday night revelers in cafes and bars on November 13, in a bloody massacre that left 130 people dead.

The bartender of a club visited by him a month ago, told the Sunday Times that, while Islamic State (Isis) routinely executes gay men, Abdeslam was very much part of the gay scene in Brussels. “We had him down as a rent boy, he was always hanging out with that kind of crowd,” the bartender who did not want to be named, stated.

Abdeslam’s brother Ibrahim, who blew himself up outside the Comptoire Voltaire cafe in Paris, ran a bar in the Molenbeek district of Brussels, dubbed the “Jihadi capital of Europe.” His close friend Karim revealed that the bar was closed down a week before the Paris attacks because he had used it as a den to sell drugs.

“Brahim [Ibrahim] and Salah spent most of their days smoking hashish and playing on PlayStation in the bar,’ he said. “There was nothing to suggest they were radicalized.”

The revelations about Abdeslam’s alleged private life contravenes the staunch moral edicts of Isis. The terror group has released several propaganda images and videos of suspected gay men and adulterers being executed, hurled off buildings to their deaths or crucified in village squares.

Battle of the billboards in Los Angeles. The Center versus AHF.

BY MARK ARIEL

The Los Angeles LGBT Center recently launched a campaign dubbed “What R U Into?” showing men at different WeHo hot spots conveying “what they’re into” by using various emojis on smart phone apps. Scrawled under the images, the message from the Center is “Whatever you’re into, caring for your sexual health is our priority at the new Los Angeles LGBT Center-WeHo.”

Located just above Gym Sportsbar and Coffee Bean at 8745 Santa Monica Blvd., the new Center-WeHo offers free HIV testing, STD testing and treatment, HIV prevention medications: PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and PEP (post-exposure prohylaxis), vaccinations for hepatitis A/B and HPV, partner notification services, and condoms.

Jim Key, LA LGBT Center: “…Smart phone apps are how people are meeting and communicating today–whether you like that or not… we wanted our campaign to acknowledge that, without stigmatizing people for it. The last thing any of us need is more stigma regarding who we are or how we have sex.” 

Fear Of Judgement

With a very different marketing approach—AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF) recently came out with billboards equating hookup apps with STIs and casual sex with greater risk of contracting HIV.

Under the AHF billboards, the type reads: “Tindr, chlamydia, Grindr, gonorrhea” and “Do you trust him?”

In an interview with THE FIGHT Jim Key, Chief Marketing Officer at the Los Angeles LGBT Center — explained the Center’s “sex positive” outreach.

“In order to get the best medical care and health advice, people need to feel completely comfortable with their healthcare providers. They need to feel free to discuss any aspect of their life that could impact their health, including sexual practices, without fear of judgement. Unfortunately, there are still too many people who don’t even feel comfortable acknowledging their sexual orientation or gender identity to their doctor, so our community isn’t getting the type of care we need and deserve.”

“We decided,” reveals Key, that “it was important for our campaign to reflect the fact that the Center is a place where everyone feels welcome–whatever their sexual orientation or gender identity–and whatever they’re into. And because smart phone apps are how people are meeting and communicating today–whether you like that or not–we wanted our campaign to acknowledge that, without stigmatizing people for it. The last thing any of us need is more stigma regarding who we are or how we have sex.”

“The reaction to the campaign has been great and more importantly, tremendous numbers of people have been coming to the Center-WeHo and we’ve helped hundreds of people get on PrEP,” states Key.

Scare Tactics

When asked if the Center’s «sex positive» marketing was driven by the fact that many community activists were angered by AHF’s “scare tactics” marketing approach—Key says the concern was first and foremost getting treatment to those in need.

“We examined marketing campaigns developed by LGBT and HIV/AIDS organizations all over the country, going back for many years, and a number of them influenced us one way or another.  But ultimately we decided on this campaign and approach–after consultation with many of our sexual health experts and outreach staff–simply because we believed it was the right one to encourage gay and bisexual men to get the care and treatment they deserve and to be aware that we offer that care at the Center-WeHo and our other facilities.”

Dr. Tony Mills from SoCal Mens Medical Group on navigating new HIV prevention strategies.

By Tony Mills, MD

I met with a patient last week—recently diagnosed with gonorrhea—to discuss STD and HIV prevention. His HIV test with the new more sensitive 4th generation assay had come back negative but the unprotected encounter that led to the STD certainly put him at risk for HIV. What are the options for someone who wants to stay HIV negative but who may occasionally have a high-risk exposure?

I always make sure patients know that risk varies depending on what activity you are engaging in. For gay men, semen is the most common vector. Thus being the insertive partner in anal sex carries a lower risk than being the receptive partner where potentially infectious semen can be taken into the body. Using a condom decreases the risk of diseases like HIV and gonorrhea that are transmitted by genital fluids, though they have less effect on those spread by skin-to-skin contact such as syphilis and herpes.

Unexpected High-Risk Exposure

Everyone has had an incident where an unexpected high-risk exposure occurred. Condoms break, needle sticks occur, judgment can be impaired… it happens. If something occurs that makes you really worried that you had a serious exposure to HIV, see a medical provider immediately. Post Exposure Prophylaxis or PEP has been around for many years and it is highly effective in stopping an HIV infection from taking hold. A combination of 2 or 3 HIV meds are taken for 28 days and the risk of HIV transmission is dramatically reduced but the trick is it needs to be started within 72 hours (3 days). PEP isn’t 100% successful but studies have shown the infection rate after PEP to be much lower than it was prior to it being used regularly. PEP is most often prescribed by providers who work in an emergency or urgent care setting and insurance coverage for PEP is generally good so cost concerns should not limit its use. PEP is great for a one time high-risk exposure but it isn’t a great solution when there are ongoing exposures that are also high risk. PEP shouldn’t be used repeatedly. If someone needs PEP more than once, a longer-term strategy is probably needed.

“Extremely Effective In Preventing HIV”

Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis or PrEP is a new HIV prevention strategy targeting people who may have ongoing high risk for acquiring HIV. It’s called PrEP because its something you do prior to the time the high-risk exposure occurs to prevent HIV from infecting your body. The only medication currently approved for this purpose is Truvada.

Truvada contains 2 different drugs that fight HIV combined in one pill and is very effective in both treating HIV and in preventing HIV infection. The medication needs to be taken every day in order to be effective and it takes about 7 days of regular use before protection is in place.

Truvada was approved by the FDA for PrEP in July 2012 but it became more widely used last year in 2014 when the CDC strongly recommended it for anyone at substantial risk for HIV, especially partners of those who are HIV positive, MSM who engage in high risk behaviors, heterosexual men and women who are at substantial risk, and intravenous drug users. PrEP has been found in most studies to be extremely effective in preventing HIV infection in a variety of populations. Effectiveness is directly correlated with adherence. Obviously taking the medication regularly is necessary in order for the drug to work, just as it is with any therapy. In the vast majority of clinical trials, no HIV infection has been seen in study participants who had detectable levels of the medication in their bloodstream.

PrEP: Preventing HIV from infecting your body

Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis or PrEP is a new HIV prevention strategy targeting people who may have ongoing high risk for acquiring HIV. It’s called PrEP because its something you do prior to the time the high-risk exposure occurs to prevent HIV from infecting your body. The only medication currently approved for this purpose is Truvada.

Generous Patient Assistance Program 

PrEP is generally very well tolerated. Side effects may include headache, mild abdominal pain and weight loss but generally they do not lead a patient to want to stop therapy. The drugs in Truvada also are effective in treating Hepatitis B so all potential users of Truvada should be screened for Hepatitis B prior to starting treatment. Kidney issues can occur but are very rare and the small amount of bone loss that occurs is felt not to be clinically significant. Additionally, patients must be CONFIRMED to be HIV negative prior to starting PrEP. This is usually done either by the 4th generation HIV antigen/antibody test or by the HIV PCR assay. Making certain that patients are truly seronegative at the time they start PrEP decreases the likelihood that any resistance to the medications might develop.

Many are concerned about the cost of PrEP. How much will it cost to cover all of those who are at high risk of HIV infection? Insurance payment for PrEP has evolved over the past years but generally is good. If no coverage is possible, a generous patient assistance program is available to cover the cost of the medication itself.

Transition From PEP To PrEP

A unique opportunity is created when patients on PEP get to the end of their course of treatment. There is an opportunity to evaluate existing HIV risk behaviors, address them head on, but, if the behaviors appear to be here to stay, to address a possible transition from PEP to PrEP. Traditionally after PEP, repeated HIV testing would be performed for the 6 months after stopping PEP to see if the PEP had worked by monitoring closely for HIV seroconversion. Patients were instructed that their HIV status was uncertain during that time and they should take full precautions to prevent any potential spread of HIV. In reality, this plan was difficult to execute as high-risk behavior often continued without any additional protection of condoms. Because patients had been taking Truvada as part of their PEP regimen and often had worked through any minor side effects, an opportunity also presents itself to transition seamlessly from PEP to PrEP and continue to provide protection for the individual patient. Patients are queried for any potential seroconversion symptoms and tested with 4th generation testing to insure that no active HIV infection is present that would be inadequately treated with use of only the two drugs in Truvada. Theoretical concerns about development of drug resistant virus have not proven to be warranted in clinical practice where drug resistance has proven extremely rare in PrEP treated patients.

PEP: Reducing the likelihood of HIV infection after potential exposure

Post Exposure Prophylaxis or PEP has been around for many years and it is highly effective in stopping an HIV infection from taking hold. A combination of 2 or 3 HIV meds are taken for 28 days and the risk of HIV transmission is dramatically reduced but the trick is it needs to be started within 72 hours (3 days). PEP isn’t 100% successful but studies have shown the infection rate after PEP to be much lower than it was prior to it being used regularly.

Amazing Opportunity To Decrease HIV Transmission

Today PEP, PrEP or a combination of the two provides an amazing opportunity to decrease HIV transmission. In spite of our best prevention efforts, approximately 50,000 patients are newly infected with HIV each year with an estimated 1.2 million individuals in the US living with HIV infection. Widespread testing can help to identify as many of those living with HIV as possible but CDC statisticians predict that about 14% of those living with the virus have never been HIV tested and do not know their status. This relatively small number of people is felt to be responsible for over 60% of new HIV infections. How do we protect those who are exposed to those who themselves do not know their status? Comprehensive HIV prevention behaviors including reductions in risky behaviors, use of condoms, and utilization of PEP and PrEP in high risk populations are integral to protect this vulnerable population from infection.

Tony Mills, M.D., specializes in the treatment of HIV and AIDS. He is one of the leading clinicians in the fields of men’s health and HIV disease. For more info visit SoCalMensHealth.com.

Nirvana’s Dr. Andrew Vanderveer on cannabis and HIV.

By Brenden Shucart

I know first-hand how helpful cannabis can be when you are HIV-positive. I had smoked pot before being diagnosed (I was in my early twenties after all), but never with any consistency or  enthusiasm. I just didn’t like the high. But a friend suggested a little reefer might help with some of the side effects from the antiretroviral medication used to keep my HIV in check. Crazy dreams which kept me up at night—vivid, uncomfortable dreams—and nausea which left me feeling tired and gross. Cannabis kept me taking my antiretroviral medication which otherwise I might have given up on. The impact it had on my anxiety and depression seemed like icing in the moment, but in the long run probably helped keep me from going too far down any number of self-destructive paths.

When the The Fight asked me if I’d be interested in speaking to Dr. Andrew Vanderveer, Medical Director at the Nirvana Clinic on Sunset for their World AIDS Day issue, I leapt at the chance. Warmth and compassion spill out of the phone. His voice betrays his roots in the South and Midwest: charming, curious, and plainspoken. He sounds like a healer.

Hello Doctor Vanderveer! Why don’t we start by hearing a little bit about you?

I’m from the Midwest originally, but i grew up in North Carolina. I went to North Carolina State on a football scholarship. I studied biology, and I got to know all about sports injuries and training and things like that. Got a masters degree in neuroanatomy in Richmond Virginia, then i went to medical school at Chapel Hill.

Why did you decide to be a doctor?

It seemed like a good career move [laughs]… I always liked science, and I like to help people. Also, my dad’s a doctor, his dad is a doctor, four of my uncles. It was kind of expected.

Why got you interested in medical cannabis?

My own personal injuries and struggles with pain is what really showed me what plants could do, that they had a place in medicine.

I was really sort of raised in and studied a lot of strict, western medicine. I didn’t believe in plants until my own experiences with really bad back pain. I was taking all kinds of pills, but nothing helped until i tried cannabis.

Then, I went to residency in Greenville, and learned more about it. I saw people suffering in the hospital and not doing well with pharmaceutical medications.

I started to educate myself about cannabis, then I started to grow it. I thought “Wow, if people can grow this plant and treat some of their symptoms, or help cure their cancer, that makes a lot of sense…”

You can’t overdose from cannabis. No one has ever died from it. People have used for thousands of years.

Was all of this in North Carolina?

Yeah. I stopped after one year of residency, moved to California and got my medical license. I’ve been here for three years.

Have you been with Nirvana that whole time?

No, I started out in San Francisco and Sacramento. I’ve been I’ve been the medical director at Nirvana for two years.

What can you tell us about Nirvana’s operational philosophy?

It’s a place where patients can come and get an affordable recommendation and everyone is welcome. Whether that be a first time patient who needs an hour with the doctor, or someone who needs a renewal who has a busy schedule and needs to get in and out.

It’s a business that wants to provide a service which is affordable, reliable and legitimate; where we can educate patients. For a lot of doctors’ offices writing cannabis recommendations that hasn’t been the case.

Most of the patients I see have a primary care doctor; but either they don’t know how to provide that recommendation or they are unwilling to provide that recommendation.

It’s somewhat looked down upon. Many doctors are unwilling to recommend cannabis, due to either fear of professional scrutiny or overall lack of knowledge.

That seems strange, we’ve had legal medical cannabis in California for the better part of a decade.

Cannabis is an ancient healing plant which has been used for thousands of years to treat a number of conditions, including HIV.

The medical use of cannabis got to a start in California because doctors wanted to be able to talk to their patients about cannabis.

What are some common ailments which cannabis can be used to treat?

Menstrual cramps, anxiety, depression, insomnia, psoriasis, nausea—

Psoriasis? Really?

Yeah, it’s really good when used topically. Cannabis can be used to treat literally hundreds of conditions.

I met one patient in Sacramento with an incredibly rare mitochondrial disease he treated with cannabis.

Do you see many patients coming in for recommendations related to HIV?

I’ve probably seen hundreds of patients [living with HIV]. The number one thing I hear from patients with an HIV diagnosis who are on antiretroviral therapy is relief from some of the side effects of their medications—nausea, anxiety & insomnia.

Sometimes people have a newer diagnosis and they are feeling bummed out, instead of going for a pharmaceutical antidepressant, cannabis can definitely help brighten the mood, and help people be a little more active—especially a sativa during the day.

Cannaboids [the active chemicals in cannabis] have anti-cancer properties. They help regulate cells and interact heavily with the immune system. There is talk they could they have a role against the actual virus.

The number one thing I hear from patients [about cannabis] with an HIV diagnosis who are on antiretroviral therapy is relief from some of the side effects of their medications—nausea, anxiety & insomnia.”

Do you have any generalized advice for individuals considering cannabis to treat any ailment?

I would start by learning about the plant—do some research. Know the source, do some experimentation; there can be wide variability in the effects. Cannabis isn’t all the same, sort of like “music isn’t just music.”

Inspect the flower, smell it, and use one that which has a smell that appeals to you or that matches with you, that matters. All the terpenes—the things that make flowers smell the way they do, like lemonene or pinine—signal to our body what the effects are going to be.

I would suggest vaporizing.

Whats the best place to self educate?

ProjectCBD.com is a good website. And I’d also recommend they check out norml.com the National Organization of Marijuana Laws. it can tell you what the laws are in their area, and other resources and people. This plant has a great way of bringing people together, form a lot of different backgrounds and different medical problems. It’s good to link up with other people and NORML is a great way to do that.

Nirvana Clinic is located at 4511 W. Sunset Blvd., in Los Angeles. Tel: 323-663-4444. Dr. Andrew Vanderveer, Medical Director at the Nirvana Clinic, can be reached via email at Doctorandyvandy@gmail.com.

Filmmaker Scott Bloom on the deadliest hate crime ever committed against the LGBT community.

By Scott Bloom

Dates of significance:

June 24, 1973 an arsonist set fire to The Upstairs Lounge, a gay bar in the French Quarter of New Orleans. That evening 32 people lost their lives in what is the deadliest hate crime ever committed against the LGBT community. Some of the victims’ families were so horrified that one of their own could actually be gay; a handful of bodies went unclaimed. “They’re fruits. Bury them in fruit jars” was a common joke heard about town, especially among law enforcement. The community was shattered.

January 2, 1989 after many miles and numerous attempts, I get sober for the final time – so far. It was a drunken spiral downward toward my bottom—a journey of a dozen years and thousands of miles that took me to very pits of despair and suicide. God saved me and I’ve spent nearly 27 years rediscovering my passions, my purpose and myself. I’ve also gained a sense of empathy and compassion for others that was missing from the previous incarnation of me. I have hope.

Today I’m a filmmaker with a passion for gay history. I’ve released three award-winning documentaries – Original Pride: The Satyrs Motorcycle Club, Call Me Troy and Out For the Long Run.

Our latest project, Southern Knights, was inspired by the tragedy at the Upstairs Lounge. As a native of New Orleans, I was privy to many of the tales of those left behind after the fire and the courage it took to heal from this senseless tragedy. Over the years, these stories haunted me and I was aghast that the memory of those who died faded so quickly from public consciousness.

I wrote the first draft some 25 years ago while I was working in a tape vault in Studio City and I put it in a drawer. I would bring the script out from time to time over the years to tweak or edit it. The story has matured, as my recovery has. It’s taken on deeper meaning as I’ve worked through my own issues of loss and trust.

Recently, my dear friend Myra Turley and I have partnered together to polish this story into a tale that pulls at the heart but offers the sense of hope that was gifted to me. Southern Knights is a journey of redemption. It’s about taking your life back after a senseless tragedy committed at the hands of the hateful and ignorant. It’s about family of choice and it’s about unexpected miracles.

And so we have begun the journey of bringing Southern Knights to life on the big screen. And as I’ve learned over the years, I’m here asking for your help.

Please go to our IndieGogo page—igg.me/at/southern-knights and donate as much or as little as you can. It all helps us get to where we need to be. And secondly, tell your friends and family. They tell me that’s how this crowdfunding thing works. Tell them in person or in a note, experience says this works best. But tell them!

Additionally we are still seeking interested investors to partner up with. Making movies is not for the faint of heart, but a project of this importance is worth taking a risk. We’ve mitigated some of that risk by writing a solid screenplay. A recent reading of the script to a local New Orleans audience elicited both laughter and tears—from a reading. Imagine how powerful this story will be when the film is complete.

Many, many thanks for helping in any way you can.

For more info visit igg.me/at/southern-knights.